Ovulation experts needed!
My weekend included the following:
- A follicle scan for my upcoming IUI. The dominant follicle is on the right ovary, so there’s actually a chance of the eggs getting into a fallopian tube. So YAY on that front. They all need a little more cooking time so I have another scan tomorrow.
- A ninety-minute massage. Ahhhh, that rocked.
- A cathartic conversation with my husband in which we tackled the tricky issue of how to deal with our mutual lack of interest in sex (though it remains to be seen whether we will actually do anything about it).
- A lot of FREAKING OUT about something that ultimately doesn’t matter.
To wit: I’m afraid that I’m going to spontaneously ovulate and miss the opportunity for my IUI. I brought this on myself by using my fertility monitor, which detects the LH surge. Despite the fact that the pamphlet says not to use the monitor while on Clomid. But my cycle is screwed up because of the general anesthesia. I’m on day 15 right now, and usually get the LH surge on day 14. But I have the follicles of someone on about day 11. So I figured I’d use the monitor and if I got the LH surge, I could call the clinic and ask them what to do. Of course I got the surge on Sunday. The monitor is known to be inaccurate at representing some things if you’re on Clomid, but is thought to be good at detecting the LH surge.
So I should call the clinic. But now I don’t want to because I’m embarrassed that I don’t understand the biochemistry of ovulation and because I was using the monitor, which is VERBOTEN. I thought maybe some of you IVF veterans could give me some reassurance. My basic question is: what controls ovulation? I mean, I know it’s a surge in LH and FSH, but how does my pituitary decide it’s time? Will my pituitary keep to its normal schedule despite my tiny follicles? And since Clomid leads to increased FSH and LH, can’t that also trigger ovulation? Is my monitor giving me a false positive or am I going to ovulate before my eggs are ready?
On the other hand, I really should STOP CARING. I’ll find out soon enough what the deal is. The worst case scenario is that tomorrow’s scan will show I ovulated already (or am about to do so), and with such immature follicles, the eggs will not be viable. BOOOO! SAD! But more important, where the hell did this stupid HOPE come from? Just a few days ago I was treating this IUI as a hoop to jump through before having another surgery. So I could move on to IVF knowing I gave IUI my best shot. Now suddenly I’m obsessing over ovulation? It’s so aggravating that no amount of disappointment will cure me of dreaming that I might get pregnant this time.