Floor dump: Pros and cons
Many months ago I was in the library looking for books on baby led weaning when I happened to see one called something like The Diaper-Free Baby. I was naturally curious, so I reached for it. But then I thought better of the impulse. Because:
1. Do I really want to touch something that has been in perhaps multiple homes where babies roam around without diapers? And…
2. What if it made sense to me. What if I was like, Yeah! This could totally work! What if I decided I needed to give it a shot.
So I decided not to take that risk. However, with the recent bout of terrible diaper rash, Bun Bun has spent quite a bit of time diaper free. And yes, she has shat on the floor several times. When this happens, Mr. Bunny and I both shout FLOOR DUMP! FLOOR DUMP! and rush around madly.
Floor dumps are not easy to clean up. Because even if you happen to be right there, it’s difficult to separate the baby from the shit without some part of the baby touching the shit. So you have to grab the baby and move the baby and clean off the baby and then deal with the fact that there’s a small pile of human feces on your floor. Cons.
But there’s also a terrible truth to floor dumps. They’re weirdly satisfying. No, don’t freak out. I’m not one of those people. But hear me out. Floor dumps mean your baby won’t be sitting in a shitty diaper for even a moment. They mean that shitting occurred and you don’t have to change a diaper. And if you use cloth (and perhaps even if you use disposables?) changing a diaper is not a ton less labor intensive than cleaning up a floor dump. Pros.
Hey, while we’re on the subject of bodily waste, can someone please explain to me why the fuck the grown women in my building can’t use the toilet without pissing on the seat? I mean, how the fuck does that happen? It has to be because people are squatting over the seat, right? BUT, there are toilet seat covers, so if you don’t want your ass to touch the seat, use one of those! I don’t fucking understand. Is it an incontinence thing? But if you know you leak (and you MUST KNOW), use a fucking toilet seat cover! WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUCK?!??!?