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I’m feeling motherfucking festive

Despite being an atheist, I totally love Christmas. I’m almost done with grades for this semester, and have a few minutes before I need to head home to get my cocktail on, SO…

I wanted to share one of my most successful stocking stuffers EVAH, in case you need something to stick in someone’s stocking. Or pie hole. Or other orifice. Oh dear. That got troubling, as you will see if you click.

These little guys are THE BEST. We’ve found so many ways to amuse our babies with them, including sticking them on other animals to create disturbing chimera-pods.  And having Bun Bun hold one between her teeth while Bunlet tried to pull it out created a pretty memorable image. I know, horrible plastic, and usually I lean towards things made of artisinally harvested organic tofu wood, but unlike all the stupid shit my mother in law is going to dump on us, they continue to be amusing year after year. AND they taste better than the weirdly floral I’m a tedious foodie home-made caramels we’ll be getting from BFB.

Speaking of gifts that the giver thinks are brilliant and the receiver wishes the giver would stop giving every god-damned year, this year our calendar features a series of Extremely Picky Carnivorous Plants, modeled on old botanical prints. Here’s my favorite: Winter

 

 

6 Comments Post a comment
  1. Bunny – these are hilarious! It might be too late for rush shipping, otherwise I’d get some for my brothers.

    December 12, 2014
  2. SRB #

    Ummmm. I want one of those calendars. AND THOSE FINGER THINGIES!

    I also think an apron with “I’m a tedious foodie” printed on it (in vegetable ink or whatever) for SOMEONE would be amazing.

    Keep talking about gift ideas…I’m listening.

    December 12, 2014
  3. I love your festive spirit! (All your spirits I love, actually). Those things are scarily amazing. Home made caramels, blech. I am inhaling sea salt caramel chocolates from whole foods by the tin. THE TIN I TELL YOU. I want to hear more about what you do with the stupid shit dumped on you by others. Are you still gift-free this year? Me, I’m all about the stockings. I’m happy with just a nice stocking.

    December 13, 2014
  4. Steph #

    Ho ho ho! Love it. Octopus tentacles and all. Thought of you while visiting the aquarium yesterday. Great idea. And as always, the calendar is awesome. How can you get any cooler? Serious. Letterpress and shit. Damn girl. Happy winter holidays.

    December 16, 2014
  5. roast pheasant with truffled chestnuts eating carnivorous plant.

    still laughing.

    The holidays brings out the best in all of us, doesn’t it. I’m a little glad that BFB’s gift is homemade caramels and not an obligatory attendance on your part to her potluck. The caramels can be tossed (I wrote composted, but that sounds too much in line with the foodie idea).

    December 17, 2014
  6. homebrewedbaby #

    whenever i finally catch up with you, i remember that you are my hero. merry tentacles to you.

    December 20, 2014

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